Darkness, My Old Friend (Marble Hornets)
by ArataDarling
Summary: Tim had always been afraid of the dark, ever since he was a child. It never went away, no matter how hard he tried. Every night in the hospital, he would sleep with his lights on. But during his and Jay's search for Alex, when they share hotel rooms, he keeps the lights off, as not to disturb Jay's much needed rest.


"Goodnight, Tim," Jay said weakly as he extended his arm to switch off the lamp next to his bed. He kept his hand lingering on the string, seeing if he could get a response from Jay, or even get him to glance over at him. At this time of night, Jay had always felt that Tim acted a bit... off. Right before the lights went out, Tim would cower under his blankets like a scared child, not saying a word or even turning to face away from the wall.

"N- Night, Jay," Tim said quickly and quietly. That was the first time he had spoken right before the room went dark in at least a week.

"Are you alright?" Jay questioned. "You always act strange around this time."

"What? No. I'm fine. It's just, you know... everything that's going on right now. It's kind of hard to get a good nights sleep."

"That's true," Jay chuckled, almost making a joke at how their lives were constantly at risk. However, Jay was grateful that Tim was in the same room as him. He felt uneasy before, but with Tim around, not as much. Sure, he wasn't able to sleep normally, but who would be able to under their circumstances? At least he got in a few hours every night. He was happy about that much.

Jay pulled the string attached to the lamp, and the room went pitch black, with the exception of a faint glow from the street lights outside, shining through the worn-down curtains of the cheap hotel. Jay pulled the covers over his head and gripped tightly to the thin pillow under him. It had been a bad habit he had picked up ever since his first night visit with the masked man. He found that the less he could see, the better.

In a couple of hours, Jay was finally able to doze off. His knuckles were almost snow white from gripping the pillow so hard, and his blanket was thrown to and fro from his constant shifting on the uncomfortable mattress. Tim, however, was the exact opposite. He fell asleep almost instantly, but only because of tiredness rather than lack of fear. In fact, it was fear, and only fear, that kept him up every night. He would be able to sleep for an hour at most, then would instantly wake up from the same reoccurring nightmare. Practically every night, he would dream that the darkness of the room was consuming him, slowly suffocating and torturing him in the worst ways possible. It was almost as if he was drowning in something that wasn't there. He was agonized by the lack of one thing; light.

Tim shot up from his bed, able to instantly muffle his sobs by biting onto his fist. It was a habit he had picked up after spending time with Jay. He had woken him up once, only to lie to his face and tell him that he had a vision of the... thing. The thing that stalked him and the one he held closest. The thing that he was forced to stand up to after his best friend fell weak under its control. The thing he had almost feared as much as darkness.

As Tim continued to muffle his sobs, he grabbed the pillow and began to hold it against his body, acting as if it were a person he could hold on to. If only he could tell Jay the truth, he was sure that Jay would be there for him. But Jay needed his rest. He had gone through so much, so much that he had never asked for. Hell, he was almost shot and killed by Alex. If it weren't for Tim, Jay wouldn't have even been in the bed next to him at this moment.

Tim looked over at Jay, who was sleeping rather peacefully. The dim light from the street barely illuminated his face, just so much that he could see Jay's facial expression. He seemed almost... happy. A smile crept upon Tim's face. It was very subtle, but it was the first hint of joy he had experienced in weeks. It seemed that the thought of Jay was the only thing that kept Tim from ending his life at this point. Jay had meant to much to him, and the thought of him being gone... Tim just couldn't bear to think of that day.

Tim snapped out of his daydream and noticed the darkness that remained around him. He began to slowly rock back and forth, keeping his cries muffled and his free hand buried in the pillow. His sobs began to get louder, as he experienced his nightmares coming to life once again. The darkness crept towards him. Every waking moment filled him with more dread and fear that he had felt in such a long time. Why had it been so bad tonight? He was usually able to control the hallucinations of darkness if he had taken his pills.

That's what he needed. His pills. He quickly reached over for the bedside table, feeling that there was nothing on it but Jay's camera, a pack of cigarettes and a lighter.

"Shit," Tim mentally yelled. He had left his pills in the car. There was no way he was going outside at this time of night, especially since the thing could have been there, waiting for him.

Jay uncomfortable shifted and slowly opened his eyes. He had been awoken by a rather loud noise. At least, it seemed that way. Everything else was completely silent; not even crickets were chirping at this time.

Jay quickly and stealthily felt around the table for his camera. He opened it and immediately pressed record. He turned on the night vision and pointed the camera at the foot of his bed. Nothing. He pointed it out the window. Again, nothing. He quickly positioned it towards Tim's bed and almost gasped. It looked as if Tim was at the verge of a seizure. He quickly set down the camera, making sure that it was still recording. He fumbled for the lamp and turned it on as quickly as he could.

"Tim! Tim, are you alright?!" Jay asked as he jumped out of bed and ran to Tim's side. "Tim!" he shouted again after receiving no answer. Tim quickly snapped out of the trauma he had been going through and looked over at Jay with big eyes.

"J- Jay, I... I can explain this, I swear," Tim choked out as he looked at possibly the only person who had cared about him right now. Jay's face was filled with fear and regret. It was almost as if he regretted ever leaving Tim alone, even if it was to sleep.

"Please do! It wasn't that tall thing, was it? Have you not taken your pills? Did that hooded thing steal them again?" Jay bombarded the man next to him with questions, as if to receive an immediate answer.

"No, it was..." Tim struggled to say the reason for all of his suffering. He had always thought that Jay would be there for him when it came to things like this, but now, he wasn't so sure. What if he thought it was childish? What if he laughed in his face? He couldn't afford to lost the only person he was close to.

"Tim, you have to tell me. We have to be honest with each other. No more secrets, remember? You said so yourself."

"I- I guess so. Just promise me that you won't... leave."

"I would never leave you. We're figuring this out together, remember? I wouldn't even be as far as I am now if it weren't for you."

"Okay..." Tim chose his next words carefully. Even after what Jay had just said, Tim still had the feeling that Jay would leave, or even worse, laugh at him. All Tim had wanted was approval from Jay, and after being so close to receiving it, he was going to lose it all. "Back in the hospital, ever since I was a kid, I had this extreme fear of the dark. It was horrible. I would have nightmares almost every night, and I would always have to sleep with the lights on. If they were ever turned off, I would have seizures or panic attacks. I know it's childish, but I still have that fear. I only sleep in the darkness now because I know that you need to sleep, even if that means I don't get to." Tim cowered down and stared at the floor, refusing to look at Jay's expression. The outcome of this scared him too much.

"Tim..." Jay sighed, "You could have just told me. I understand." Jay sat on the bed next to Tim and put his arm around his shoulder. Ever after this, Tim refused to look up. It wasn't so much as fear of rejection now, but nervousness. Tim's face flushed a deep red as he once again smiled ever so slightly, though he was shaking horribly. "Hey. Look up," Jay said sincerely. Tim slowly lifted his head to meet Jay's eyes. He quickly realized that Jay was blushing as well, but not nearly as bad as he was. "Don't ever be afraid to tell me something, especially when it's as important as that. You need to stop worrying about me. I'm fine," Jay smirked. Tim nodded his head, afraid to say anything. He had never been this close to Jay.

Jay planted a quick kiss on Tim's forehead and blushed. "I'm always here for you. Don't ever forget that."


End file.
